Creating an intercultural community

Alice Wellum
(Age 21, Germany)

To understand how people of different cultures can life together peacefully it is important to understand one thing: we are all alike. We laugh when we think something is funny, we cry when someone we love dies. These are basic human emotions which (almost) every person shares and which are instantly recognizable across all cultures. Sometimes it appears as though our differences are greater than our similarities. It was this bias that my friends and I sought to overcome with our project.

For the last two years I have been part of a very special community here in Maastricht. It is a beautiful town, full of old buildings and churches and history, with a nice atmosphere. The first year that I lived here I felt lonely. In Maastricht every student has his own room, and even if people live together in one house they live very individual lives separate from one another. I enjoyed seeing my friends, but even so I missed the familiarity of having a home together. So when four of my friends asked me if I would like to move into a house together with them, I jumped at the chance and said yes, of course!

We all knew from the beginning that our house would be different. First of all, all of us came from many different countries. One boy had an Iranian/ Finish background, another boy was Canadian but had spent two years living in Hong Kong. Then there were two Germans and I, an English/ German person who had previously lived in Belgium. All of us had been exposed to many different cultures at one point. We brought with ourselves many ideas, many worldviews, many ideologies. But we all had something in common: the belief that although we were different, we could live together peacefully. Together made sure that every person was accepted for who he or she was, was loved for what he or she brought into the community. We kept an atmosphere of love and trust. Because of this, our house began to grow. Now a Nepalese boy lives with us, a girl from New Zealand and a boy from the US. Guests frequently stay in our living room. We take an interest in one another, cook together and talk about what is important to us. During the recent troubles in Nepal we kept a close eye on the news and made sure our Nepalese friends knew we were there for him. The house cooks together, we talk about what is important for ourselves, we talk about our feelings. The last part is especially important and contributes a lot to the open atmosphere in the house.

Of course there are times of conflict. So many cultures cannot be together without the inevitable clashing of viewpoints. In those cases it was always important not to ‘explode’, but to talk calmly and respect the other person’s opinion. I’ve learnt that you do not have to agree with another person about an issue, but that this doesn’t have to change your perception about the person in essence. I’m more able to accept now that a person can have a different point of view from mine, but still a person I like and respect, even if we differ in opinions about headscarves and the death sentence. It’s one of the hardest things to do for me- liking someone for who they are, and allowing them to keep their opinion and listen to them even if I do not agree. Yet I am learning.

Since starting up this house, we have come far. We have met many people. Some stayed for a while, some moved on. We took an interest in people, so interesting people came to us. Once an immigrant man from Suriname came to our house and talked to us about his life. Another time a girl who had spent some time in a mental institution stayed with us. Those times were both difficult- but it was amazing for me to see that these people too were accepted, and that our house was able to take them. I know that on my own I would not have been that strong.

The ideas we share in our community extend further. The boy from Canada has started up an international student group focusing on sustainability and poverty. It has been going on for almost a  year and has thirty members. During a workshop in Hungary I watched several of my ‘house’ friends naturally bridge gaps between people they hardly knew by accepting who they were and taking an interest in them.

Our house is special because it has the ability to accept people for who and what they are, regardless of their background and culture. Open-mindedness and accepting other people is a necessary essential which has kept the house together for the past two years. For this it is important that people are able to view their opinions without being laughed at, but are taken seriously.

This is what works: love and respect for the other person, open communication, and knowing that you are in a place where you as a person are accepted, regardless of your culture. I believe that my house is not an exception: it is something which is possible to build up anywhere. Indeed, there is another house in Maastricht which has been able to create just this atmosphere and successfully supports people suffering from cancer. Whether the community has a common interest or not, as long as there is a feeling of innate acceptance of the other person, intercultural living and learning is possible. I can guarantee this. After all, it is what has been shown to me again and again over the past two years.